shuckl: shuckl: shuckl: toast annoys me so much cos like it’s bread that’s been toasted so we call it “toast” but if you fry a potato it’s not called a “fry” fries do you ever look back at your mistakes
ohmightysmiter: it was just a show about clones i did not sign up for all of this feelings bullshit
notahoe: eyebrows can literally either make you or break you
andivictoria: andivictoria: this douchebaggy ass woman sitting behind us has been wearing sunglasses all dinner ugh stop nevermind she’s blind
quazza: i am reminded that english is a flawed language every time I am forced to use “that that” in a sentence
imthejesusofsuburbia: the reason high school is so difficult is because ned never made a guide for anything past 8th grade
singergurl91: moonflowerlights: If you’re having a bad day, just remember that the Raptor sounds from Jurassic Park were actually a recording of turtles having sex Also, just remember that Tom Hiddleston can make that noise on command…
thefunniestpost: kawaiians: if i were a caterpillar i would probably emerge from my cocoon as another slightly fatter caterpillar
rabioheab: *starts a mosh pit at elementary school choir concert*
banananasareamazing: behavingisoverrated: pizza: there’s 100 millon ppl on tumblr so if we all put in $20 we could buy tumblr for $2 billion and then yahoo couldn’t have it PIZZA YOU’RE SO SMART
whatdoyouknowaboutmycupcakee: lovestoryforthebooks: startthesirens: raggedy-andy: 3-amsecrets: this is my favorite thing tyra banks has ever said Tyra Banks can be problematic as hell, but I really like this. I fucking love Tyra im crying ♥ give me chills and started to tear
sherlockedbyphaninthetardis: davedirk: davedirk: lauraforgood: m33wlin: WE WERE WATCHING THIS MOVIE IN GYM AND THE MAIN CHARACTER WAS LIKE “I’M TIRED AND HUNGRY AND HORNY” AND ME AT THIS OTHER CUTE GUY IN THE BACK JUST BOTH GO “SAME” AND LOOK AT EACH OTHER AND I WINKED AND EVERYONE WAS SO UNCOMFORTABLE BUT I WAS LAUGHING REALLY HARD AND THIS IS WHY I DONT HAVE FRIENDS can we have a...
victyrion: oh btw kudos to orphan black for passing the bechdel test with lying colours
royal-high: a kid from my school just got expelled today for pretending to be russian for 8 months. he pretended he couldn’t read, write or talk english he did good in all his classes because he had all the teachers and principles convinced he just moved from russia, so they didn’t make him do any work
cokeflow: tumblr has defiled my sense of humor and now I’m on this new tier of humor that no one in real life understands
mathmaticalkrillbits: “No” I whisper softly as I forget to hold in ‘alt’ while reblogging
hepatitisbey: I don’t want to learn in a classroom anymore. I want to travel and talk to people and learn that way. I want to learn as I go, gathering knowledge and not being rigorously tested on it. I don’t want to lose passion in the things I like because of the worry of exams. I want to fuelled by snippets of knowledge I gain from people and be inquisitive. School has stolen my passion for...
sabrinagrimm: sabrinagrimm: WHEN I WAS 4 I WAS ON SESAME STREET AND I HAD AN INTERVIEW WITH GROVER AND HE ASKED ME HOW IT FELT WHEN I FALL OFF MY BIKE AND I CHUCKLED DARKLY AND SAID “I DON’T FALL OFF MY BIKE” AND HE LOOKED AT THE CAMERA AND SAID “oh.” NAD THEN I SATRTED POINTING AND LAUGHIGN AT HIM AND THEN THEY CUT TO THE NEXT SCENE AND THAT WAS IT THAT IS MY LEGACY
afrogay: worldfamousprofessor: look down your shirt and spell attic a titty i see just one i only see one where did my other boob go
dietchola: the guy who played all of the oompa loompas in charlie and the chocolate factory is named deep roy deep roy
fuqyourlies: reasonswhydansafail: sleepingartist: urbancatfitters: if i ever start a band i’m going to name it “music” and then it will be literally impossible to find any of our songs on the internet the first album : “Unknown album” the hit single: “track 1” album art Some people wanna watch the world burn
sojetlife: tinychatter: imagine reading a book of all the lies you’ve told Imagine reading a book of all the lies that were told to you.
wizardsandhijack: hospitalf0rsouls: Omfg so if Mary had baby Jesus, and baby Jesus was the Lamb of God… did Mary have a little lamb? you broke the world
tumbler-teen: who cares if school doesn’t teach us how to raise a family or get a job like at least I can find the area of a triangle.
twerking-with-assquatch: twerking-with-assquatch: twerking-with-assquatch: twerking-with-assquatch: twerking-with-assquatch: what happens if you run in front of a car you get tired what happens if you run behind a car you get exhausted this is comedy gold. you should take notes